Leslie Leyland Fields dispels this and numerous other parenting myths in her new book, Parenting Is Your Highest Calling and Eight Other Myths That Trap Us in Worry and Guilt. I don’t usually read parenting books, though I did read The Five Love Languages of Children and was thoroughly enlightened–definitely one of my favorite non-fiction books. And I did enjoy Mother Nurture, which I reviewed back in July. But I was intrigued by the title since many moms like myself are often bombarded with guilt and worry when it comes to raising our children.

Now, before I received the book I was told it would have some scriptural references but the topic would be of interest to parents and families of all walks of faith. I am totally okay with that; I’m not one to shy away from a book that might reference other beliefs as long as it’s not a negative book if that makes sense. (I really enjoyed the “pray” section of Eat, Pray, Love and I’m definitely no yogi!) That being said I found Parenting Is Your Highest Calling to be a bit much for me. It didn’t have just a few scriptural or faith-related references; it was chock full of them. It was a bit heavier reading than I had anticipated (e.g. the myth titled “You represent Jesus to your children”). I just didn’t see myself taking the time to fill out the “Reflection and Discussion” sections at the end of every chapter, but then again, perhaps I’d be a better mother if I did. Who knows?

On the other hand, this book did make a great effort dispelling nine myths of parenting including “Having children makes you happy;” “Good parenting leads to happy children;” and my favorite, “You will always feel unconditional love for your children.” Now THAT one I know is a myth after birthing four very different children! I really liked this excerpt on page 23 from the section “Why do we have children at all?”:

Having children today defies personal economics. Web sites coolly calculate the cost of raising a child at anywhere between $150,000 and $1 million each. Children simply cost too much–and not just in dollar figures. They undo us. They shows us how much and how little we’re made of. It often seems that they come only to break our hearts. And we let them. We invite it all. We admit perfect strangers through our doors and decide to love them wildly, without condition, for as long as we live.

So why do we have children? The answer is simple: to learn to love. “At the heart of our desire to have children, then even beyond our hopes for happiness, is the longing to love.” That is probably my favorite part from the entire book. It’s such a simple yet beautiful concept…and it rings true.

From my favorite myth (”You will always feel unconditional love for your children”) Fields shares with us this insight:

Though we may not always feel a deep, unconditional love for our children, that does not mean we love them any less. When our children disobey, then they cause harm to another, when they choose attitudes and actions that cut against the holiness God desires, we will have an emotional response–if we truly love them. Loving them means that we desire their highest good. … We may feel anger, as God does. We may feel hurt, as God does. We may feel disgust, as God does. Love not only allows these feelings; it requires them.

Leslie is the mother of six, and as she points out in Parenting Is Your Highest Calling, imperfect like the rest of us. Hearing about some of her challenges and stories from other women makes it easier to dispel those nine myths and feel a little less guilty when your parenting isn’t up to par. Perhaps if I didn’t have some wonderful girlfriends who are figuring out this motherhood thing with me–and making me feel less guilty–I’d read more parenting books! –Emily

P.S. If you enjoy a good parenting book but aren’t sure how much religion you’d like with your reading, check out the book from the library first to make sure it’s right for you.)

** Giveaway! We are giving away two copies of Parenting Is Your Highest Calling. Please leave a comment with a valid email address for our drawing. We’ll draw the winners from the comments and contact them via email. Deadline: March 13, 2009 (midnight). The winners will have 24 hours to claim their prize or a new winner will be chosen.

* Congratulations to Rebecca F. and Candice B., the winners of the giveaway! Thank you to everyone who took the time to read the review and add a comment. Keep reading the Daily Dish for your chance to participate in more giveaways!

Over time my interest in the celebrity lifestyle has seriously faded. Where I used to read gym copies of People and Us Weekly from cover to cover, I now find myself only glancing through an issue if it’s highlighting the best and worst beach bodies (sorry, it’s true). When I was sent a copy of Mother Nurture: Life Lessons from the Mothers of America’s Best and Brightest I wondered what I would find in its pages. Would it be Lindsay Lohan’s mom sharing her wisdom on parenting the inner child or Bruce Jenner’s advice on setting reasonable allowance limits for the Kardashian kids, say, $100 a week?

Thankfully, no. This book was a refreshing reprieve from not only People but also the plethora of parenting advice with which we are inundated on a daily basis. Written by fashion designer and entreprenur Stephanie Hirsch, the book started from a mother’s desire to raise her son to be “generous, family-oriented, loving, courageous, and professionally accomplished–maybe [even] turn out like Steven Spielberg.” After a conversation with Spielberg’s mom more interviews with mothers of “America’s best and brightest” soon followed.

I love many things about Mother Nurture, the first being that it offers common-sense advice from mothers who’ve helped raise successful children in a variety of fields, from sports and politics to music and business and everything in between. Though I recognized most of the names I found a few I hadn’t heard of but enjoyed reading nonetheless. Another great things about these “vignettes of maternal instinct at its best” is you can read them in bits and pieces. Each portrait is only a couple pages so you can read two or twenty depending on how long you can hide in the bathroom before the kids find you.

The best thing about Mother Nurture is how down to earth these mothers’ words of wisdom are; I might even be able to implement them in my own parenting “vignette.” I love Terri Augello’s advice to her daughter Alicia Keys: “It’s a fickle world out there. They could love you today. They can hate you tomorrow. So…make sure that you keep your family and friends close around you.” And Linda Armstrong Kelly’s dose of common sense for all moms: “If you shelter your children, you don’t really do them any favors.”

We are all doing our best to raise America’s best and brightest, so why not get some help from those who have some experience doing so. Mother Nurture: Life Lessons from the Mothers of America’s Best and Brightest does a fabulous job uplifting, encouraging and inspiring, something even non-celeb moms need. –Emily

* Giveaway!! HarperCollins is giving away one copy of Mother Nurture! Please leave a comment telling us your favorite parenting words of wisdom and include a valid email address for our drawing. We’ll draw the winner from the comments and contact her via email. Deadline: July 31, 2008 (midnight). The winner will have 24 hours to claim her prize or a new winner will be chosen.

I jumped at the chance to review Writing Motherhood on Boutique Cafe’s Daily Dish for two reasons: one, I am a mother, and two, I love to write. Both mothering and writing are still a work in progress so I was anxious to read what insights, advice, tools, and guidance Writing Motherhood had to offer me. It had all that to offer with an added kick in the pants to start writing again (not easy to do when a recent manuscript has already been rejected numerous times).

I have not made my way through the entire book, and I’ve learned it’s not the type to be read cover to cover in one sitting. The book is a tool and a guide to help intertwine writing and mothering, teaching readers like me that inspiration can come from the everyday. I usually have a bit of a harder time reading non-fiction books but the author Lisa Garrigues’ wit and writing style (no surprise) had me from page one. Here are a couple passages I’ve starred in my copy so far:
Garrigues’ take on the students (a.k.a. moms) from her first writing class:

My first Writing Mothers arrived feeling physically exhausted and emotionally spent–in some cases ‘brain-dead,’ their imagination and creativity anesthetized by the rigors and routines of daily life. (Sound familiar?)

Her thoughts on taking the first step:

Carl Jung would call it synchronicity. A priest might call it fate; a romantic, serendipity; a skeptic, luck. However you choose to explain this phenomenon, know that one step always leads to athe next. This is how mountains are scaled, deserts are crossed, and whole journeys are made. (Feeling inspired?)

Garrigues, a writer and a mother, takes what seems like an overwhelming task at times and turns it into a welcome journey. An excerpt from WritingMotherhood.com put it perfectly:

Whether you are a new mother or a grandmother, someone who has long aspired to write or someone who has never written before, in Writing Motherhood Lisa Garrigues will show you how to use writing as both a tool for recording your life and a path to understanding your experiences. In just fifteen minutes a day, your Mother’s Notebook will be a keepsake, and your daily writing will keep you sane.

Are you ready to recapture the sanity you thought was lost long ago? Me too. Take a minute to read a little more about the book and Lisa Garrigues. I guarantee it won’t be long before you’re standing in Barnes & Noble picking out the perfect Mother’s Notebook. I’m planning to go tomorrow. –Emily

** Giveaway!!! Simon & Schuster is giving away 10 copies of Writing Motherhood! Please leave a comment with a valid email address for our drawing. We’ll draw the winners from the comments and contact them via email. Deadline: July 25, 2008 (midnight). The winners will have 24 hours to claim their prize or a new winner will be chosen.

* Congratulations to all ten winners of the Writing Motherhood giveaway! Thank you to everyone who took the time to read the review and add a comment. Keep reading the Daily Dish for your chance to participate in more giveaways!

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Happy Mother’s Day to all of the moms and moms to be in our community. You have a tough job, but it’s the most important one in the world! I honor each of you today and say thank you for all you do to nurture your families and raise fantastic children!! Feel special today (and everyday).
XOXO!
Daria